a coupleofbiers

Out of the Hearts of Babes

2011-12-30T08:34:00.000-05:00

I will now pretend like it hasn't been 7 months since I've posted on this blog.

Every night - and even before most daytime naps - we say prayers. Matthew has always tolerated this ritual well, especially for a little guy. He went through a stage for a while this past year and no longer had the energy to come up with something to say to this God his parents are always talking about and talking to. As long as he'd recite "Dear God, Thank you for all of my blessings. In Jesus' name, Amen" then he was off the hook.

Well, there's been a resurgence lately and his prayers have been downright inspired. The boy even prays in tongues (I'm only half kidding - he'll be praying and just start making different sounds that sound pretty earnest without skipping a beat). Mike and I usually have heads bowed way down low, to hide our grins and suppressed giggles (Mike giggling - ha!). Last night was another one that was so incredibly cute, such a huge blessing, that I knew I needed to record it somewhere. I often get these fleeting, silly little thoughts that if I record something on this blog then the perpetual ball will start rolling and lead to many-a-great post. That may or may not happen, but at least the world will have this precious prayer from the heart of my boy:

"God: I just really need you to please come help me go to sleep. I can't do it alone. But...are you still a baby? Because I sleep on the top bunk and grown-ups can't come up here because they're too big but if you're still a baby then you can come lay down beside me and help me sleep. Thank you, God and I love you. Amen."

And Evelyn? She says "BeachSplash" for water, the ocean, a lake, anything with sand...that's the word "BeachSplash." After she got a new book from my sister last night and promptly located and named the BeachSplash in the picture, my ingenious sister said "You should really write that down somewhere." Sis: Done!

Jonah? He's an amazing stunt baby rolling all around on the floor as I type. He can even recover his hands from under his tummy after such a roll. Truly incredible.

Happy New Year! I really do hope to leave more than one post in 2012.

It's Summer in the South

2011-05-14T12:59:00.003-04:00

The Short, Amazing People

2011-05-11T13:16:00.001-04:00

Gotta share...

2011-02-03T21:21:00.001-05:00

My ex-roommie and sweet friend, Becky, is a pastor in Sacremento. I read her latest blog post just now and felt it was too good to keep to myself. Hope you find in reading it that there's something for you.

worshipping the God of love, justice, and grace > not niceness, status quo, and lowering the bar.

D) A multiple choice test.

2011-01-31T20:33:00.003-05:00

It is perplexing that opposing worldviews can co-exist. Life is easier when there is a better or worse, a yes or no, a true or false, a positive or negative. When these categories are no longer, _________ remains. [HINT: This is not a fill in the blank question. Maximum 300 words]

Fear Not!

2011-01-05T21:59:00.006-05:00

Where there is anxiety, there is always a sense of threat.

In myself and others who have anxiety, we smother dilemma/chaos onto people and say to them such phrases like “it’ll be okay,” or “it’s alright.”

The irony is we need those words whispered back to us...

If we will slow down, center ourselves, then maybe we will hear this voice.

[insert angelic picture here]

Secret Identities Revealed

2010-12-12T23:51:00.004-05:00

The Saint Nicholas of Myra “had a reputation for secret gift-giving.”

If a man had a reputation involving secrecy, then we really shouldn’t know anything about him. I assume the last thing he wanted was a reputation; he wanted no personal glory. Yet somehow his disguise had a loophole. This led me to wonder… for a bit… how Power is ceaselessly dynamic in the delicate balance of giving and receiving... and how Shame is at risk when a name or a face is revealed.

This probably struck me because of the comic superhero kick I’m treating my son and nephew. For the most part, superheroes have secret identities, even the bad guys. The main reason that comes to mind for these nifty costumes is they wear it for their protection. For some, the benefit of a disguise is when the superhero’s day is done he or she can turn to the normal façade and blend in with society. They can view their image no longer someone who stands above the rest and revels in the spotlight but someone who is simply among the crowd. Without their disguise, they probably feel as if they wouldn’t connect well with humanity. I’m sure I could expound upon a multitude of reasons, but ultimately I believe the superhero disguise protects them from their laziness. If superheroes never wore the silly outfit and continued to perform their superhuman strengths, they would be battling an imperishable foe, Pride; without their disguise the superheroes are not just naked, but naked and talented.

A secret identity is about not wanting to be bothered, which is not necessarily a bad idea when our sanity is in desperate need of restoration. It is of caution that Pride wins the day when one hides (and subsequently gets lazy) behind their secret identity. Conversely, the enemy is lured into the open when the mask is removed. The flesh has a distinct scent.

Living in the two different worlds of secret vs. revealed creates more problems. The mightiest superheroes are the ones who know how to battle Pride head-on, whose true identity is their strength, and vice versa. Their Shame is their mask, and that is their Power. Both evil and good understand this.

This is probably why Nicholas of Myra became a Saint in the Church. He didn’t care as much for preserving his secrecy than he did meeting the needs of poor. So what if he had a reputation for secret giving?! So what if his disguise was vulnerable?!

All in all, I think it is appropriate that Sinterklaas (Saint Nicholas in Dutch) became linked with the Christ Mass. St. Nick’s charitable legacy is a helpful reminder that giving and receiving is best performed not to one’s personal glory but to the glory of God. The mighty God of Israel revealed himself in his vulnerability by becoming born as a baby… among other feats.

Carolann Evans - What a great teacher!

2010-08-09T21:30:00.007-04:00

Calling all Carolann Pitts Evans fans:

As many of you know, this is Ms. Evans last year teaching. I have an idea that will hopefully make this last year extra special for her. Wouldn't it be awesome if every week, specifically every Monday (b/c Mondays are the worst) Ms. Evans received something at school that reminded her of the impact that she has made in so many people's lives? It could be something as little as a note or something bigger: flowers, a meal, etc. I'm sure many of you could be much more creative than me - do whatever you feel will bless her.

I will keep track of who has each Monday - therefore, if you're interested in participating, just send me a message and I'll let you know what Mondays are still available for the taking. Then I'll also send you a reminder message a week before 'your' Monday. If I can help facilitate the delivery/presenation, I will try. Jessica (Goodwin) Price teaches with her and is in on this little scheme and will help however she can as well. Obviously, there's no way I'm friends with all the people that would want to participate. If you know someone who you think would like to participate, please have them message me on Facebook or they can email at anniebiers@gmail.com. It'd be great to have many classes represented. There's only 32 Mondays in the school year, so if there's a bigger response, we'll think of a way to utilize all that love! And if you have any ideas to add to this general Rock-Carolann's-World plan, please let me know.

So I'll take this first Monday, August 16th and we'll go from there. Thanks for considering!

Mondays up for grabs:

September 13th, 20th & 27th
October 4th, 18th & 25th
November 1st, 8th, & 29th
December 6th & 13th (the last Monday before Christmas break)
January 10th, 24th & 31st
February 7th, 14th (the Monday before her birthday) & 28th
March 14th, 21st & 28th
April 11th, 18th & 25th
May 2nd, 9th, 16th & 23rd (the last Monday of the year)

Video Update

2010-08-02T20:01:00.003-04:00

High Pass Filtering...

2010-07-10T11:24:00.012-04:00

Recently, I toyed with the photos below using high pass filtering and balance adjustments to color, contrast, levels, and exposure. The end-product of some color portraits below resemble, in my opinion, Norman Rockwell or even Abercrombie subjects. However, Annie thinks they look like Tin Men!

Tackling High: Off with their heads!

2010-04-25T15:21:00.004-04:00

The "conservative" ownership group of the Pittsburgh Steelers more than likely knew of Ben Roethlesberger's continual misbehavior off the field, even before the Milledgeville incident. In the realm of professional sports, no paid athlete is threatened of being axed until they get caught. Ben Roethlesberger was winning games for a storied franchise: of course the owners or the NFL wouldn't act then. The public has mentioned the Steelers ought to give this guy (yet) another chance by not cutting him from the team. It amazes me to see the amount of forgiveness professional athletes and celebrities recieve from their communities without getting fired.

Our hearts are sold by what is on the television or the tabloids instead of being directed towards care and concern of the sex-offender(s) in our own community who need yet another chance. It seems easier to embrace someone we don't know in the entertainment industry because we know too well the risk of embracing a coward on our own turf. We are fooled by this irony because we are the coward who would rather stay lost in a distant world, a seemingly better world, when the world at hand is begging us to engage its dangerous glory.

To dream of church today, of what it can be, I hope the people of God are committed to one another as to prepare for the Light of the World. It means one thing for a business to offer forgiveness to its greatest asset because the profit-center would not quickly recover from the financial loss, not the physical loss. But to count someone as irelevant in your church community because they do not represent the people of God, it is practically not counting them at all and that is a shame! What we as Christians ought to count in churches is not attendance nor offerings for salary, building space, missions, but the cost of the Crucified Lord who counted the cost of ALL. By welcoming the incarnate God we will count in our congregation the absence of the one we kick out, namely, Christ.

Soaking up time with the firstborn

2009-11-03T20:23:00.004-05:00

With just a few days left of only-child-bliss, we've been super-attentive of Matthew and relishing our moments with him. He was diagnosed with Pneumonia a week ago tonight and is making a good recovery. I let him go outside and soak up a little Vitamin D today and took advantage of such a beautiful Fall day to snap some photos. Our little boy has no idea how his life's about to change, but we know he's going to be a great big brother.

38 Weeks

2009-11-03T16:16:00.008-05:00

My favorite profile pic yet.

11/11

2009-10-30T19:33:00.004-04:00

Well, we did it. We proverbially pissed...you know, as opposed to staying on the pot?

We called today and put our names on the list for scheduled C-sections. We chose November 11th and they scheduled us for 7:30 am.

I still feel some heaviness as I come to terms with a seemingly inevitable section, but I am also so very grateful. I didn't realize how much hanging on to my own hopes and wishes was keeping me from just the utter joy at soon meeting my new child. All day my joy and gratitude has been gently unfolding and I find myself praising God for the many miracles in my life and even repenting for my perception of loss. As I told Mike the other night, the story of Adam and Eve has a definitive climax when God calls the couple out on their bad behavior and, in administering punishment, relays to Eve that she would be cursed with pain during childbirth. I asked my husband, Is it crazy that I've been begging God for the curse? Perhaps this whole time God's been slapping his forehead in dismay wondering what his His fool-headed girl is putting so much of her hopes into (not the first time God has experienced this where I'm concerned, I'm sure).

The facts are: I have a bicornuate uterus, more sweetly known as 'heart-shaped'. Come to think of it, I found out about said heart uterus in the UW ER one night when I was 6 weeks into my pregnancy with Matthew and began bleeding heavily. Other than discovering the shape of my uterus, no other big discoveries were made that night. Despite the bleeding, it appeared me and baby were fine. Fast forward 31 weeks, and I learn that even though Matthew had been head-down and engaged just a week before, he had turned into the transverse breech position. I found myself at the hospital undergoing the second of 2 external versions. The doc tried - trust me he tried - but Matthew was stuck and could not be turned back to the heads-down position. A C-section was scheduled and I was bummed, but there was also so much newness, glory and goodness pouring forth into my life during that time that the experience of loss was not profound. Fast forward another 14 months and Mike and I are yet again at another hospital. This time I was in for a D & C following a miscarriage. It was after this experience that I really began to research my cute, little uterus and uteri like it. I remember the first website I came to described the bicornuate uterus as a birth defect. What?!? I have a frickin birth defect and didn't know it? I read many women's stories and several statistics and it turns out that this bicornuate deal can actually be a big deal. Many women struggle with being able to get pregnant and many more are unable to stay pregnant. Indeed, I am so blessed to have experienced a healthy pregnancy - a second healthy pregnancy - with what we're as sure as we can be a healthy baby.

Then, there's this other side of me wanting to experience childbirth...you know, that thing us women as designed to be able to carry-out. Mike and I have read books, watched films, consulted ourselves to death and sought education to aid us in having as natural a childbirth as possible. A little over a month ago we discovered that this baby was also breech. He or she hasn't been transverse on the sonogram, but feet and butt first mostly, though I can attest to the fact that it moves around A Lot! I have held on to hope. An amazing doula named Belynda has provided us with so many tips and insight into helping inspire baby to turn. More than anything, her perceptions, experiences and knowledge passed on to us a sense of empowerment and of being involved in something utterly mystique and beautiful. I've also been blessed to have found a great chiropractor who has genuinely wanted to do what he could to help baby turn. But, Mike and I met with the OB who we've chosen to the the C-section on Wednesday and - jerk though I think he is (personal opinion, people) - he brought up good points and basically told us that we really had some important questions to consider, one being that should anything adverse occur during the labor process, would we forever wonder why we were so gung-ho in taking the risk in the first place. He's right. It's a good question.

So, (and I know I'm rambling) the bottom line is that we want a healthy baby and as healthy a momma as possible and it seems that the best route at this time for those two things to happen is to schedule the section. Could this baby still turn? Of course. There are no limits (obviously) to the miracles that can occur in life. But...hol-i-ness...Mike and I are soon going to have another baby!!!!!!!! I am really so, so excited! And again, I know there is nothing wrong with me, with us, having wanted so badly to experience the natural process of childbirth. But babies are miracles. All of them. No matter how they get here. And I can only be in awe that God should show such love, grace and favor to Mike and I as to bless us with another little life to hold.

So, that's the update for now. Thanks for your support and prayers and be sure and get your inboxes ready for the influx of the most adorable pictures you've ever seen come November 12th. : )

Our loving God is mighty

2009-10-22T20:48:00.007-04:00

For the first 15 months of Matthew's life it seemed neither he nor Annie and I slept well. Memories of countless interupted nights are not far from us especially as we await the arrival of a newborn. Since January, since we moved to Georgia, Matthew has been sleeping great. We attribute it to the anxiety Matthew read from his parents in the craze of our last year in Seattle: photo-finish Masters degrees, finalizing the adoption pro-se, living with our sister-in-law, saying good-bye to our dear friends, selling our possessions and planning our move to the great GA. We also attribute Matthew sleeping great in GA to the behavior his parents, namely "us," had to assume before we entered the bedroom of our crying awoken one. We knew Matthew wanted us to hold him, rock him, etc., but we also knew that immediate attachment would stimulate him because once we finally layed him back in his crib, he would begin crying again and want to be held -- thus adding coals to the furnace of the "not-maintaining-adequate-rest train."

This train needed to be de-railed. We knew we had to do something. Via means of veteren consultation, our plan of action was to enter the room never to look at him in the eye, never to speak or whisper anything to him, and never to touch him except to lay him back down and cover him up with the blankets, and then only to leave the room promptly, swiftley, and quietly -- like a ninja. We repeated that process until eventually Matthew got the idea that he had to sleep. He stopped crying. He started sleeping. We started sleeping.

I say all of this because Matthew is now not sleeping well as of recently. Annie and I both reason this must be because he is now sleeping in a toddler bed with toddler sheets and also because Matthew knows there will be someone else living in the house with us in the coming days, his new brother/sister.

But I say all of this because I was realizing something tonight as I put Matthew to bed tonight.

Our loving God is mighty.

Annie, Matthew, and I are all dealing with change. Change is hard. Change is taking the seemingly big step into the unknown; it takes a lot of courage. Change may be advancing your career, dying your hair, having a second child, and maybe even switching from a crib to a toddler bed, but in the end all change involves struggling with an exchange of power.

Tonight I felt the weight of sorrow for my son. I knew that he's gotta be wondering what kinda world was he born into that requires so much of him already at 2 years old. And at the same time I helped carry the joy of journeying together through this shared life that God has given us both. When I look back to the times in my life when courage was asked of me I begin to see a beautiful story filled with adventure, mystery, and excitement...

It is late and my wife is still at work. As I type this I now hear Matthew cry the words from his room "I don't wanna take a nap."

I thank God that he delights in us. I thank God for the delight I have of being Matthew's father and the proximity to what God is growing inside of each of us. Sleepless nights do not even stand a chance against Annie and I ever relinquishing our blessed paternal priviledge. It comes [without saying] with the job.

Tonight I realized it is time for me to contemplate, give thanks and praise that our God, who is love, is mighty to have done His job.

An ultrasound on Wednesday confirmed it...

2009-09-25T13:53:00.005-04:00

Apparently the fruits of my womb find the heads down position totally uncool. Maybe they know something I don't. I hope I find out and fix it, though, because C-section #2 is something I dread to the nth extreme.

Prayers would be nice. Perhaps even some "Turn baby, turn" chanting. Whatever you feel led to do. As for me, you may find me at the chiropractor, floating in a pool, burning incense beside my pinky toes, doing pelvic rocks with the exercise ball and possibly even sitting while my husband paints a baby in the correct position on my belly for inspiration. These are busy days.

The day I lost my son at Turner Field

2009-09-13T00:08:00.003-04:00

Parenting is one of life’s most valuable responsibilities: cultivating, nurturing, leading, loving, disciplining, feeding, teaching, and even letting go of a human life. As parents to our infant-toddler son Matthew and the baby on deck, Annie and I are approaching the sophomore season of our parent-child senses. I have to admit after Matthew was in this world I related to dogs when they hear the high-pitched whistle that no human can hear. The sense your baby has begun crying even though he is downstairs with the baby monitor turned off is louder than the alarm clock screaming next to your head. The presence of your child never leaves you, except for a few rare occurrences…

A few weekends ago I enjoyed back-to-back games at Turner Field in Atlanta. Saturday night was spent with my wife and her friend from work and Sunday’s game was with my sister-in-law, her son, and my son. After every Sunday Braves game at Turner Field, kids ages 4-14 are invited to run the bases after the ballgame is over. Dylan, my 3-year-old nephew, is tall for his age and could easily pass as a 4-year-old. So Stephanie and I agreed I should take Dylan down to run out onto the field. The deal was this: I had Stephanie’s son, while Stephanie watched my son.

There is a secret list in my brain of people I trust to “watch” Matthew. When the people on this list watch Matthew I don’t worry. I don’t call. I trust parents more than non-parents. I trust family more than non-family. What I have noticed what occurs in my brain when people on that secret list watch Matthew is this: my Matthew radar becomes faint. There is comfort in knowing that my sweet, innocent, vulnerable son is being cared for and his basic needs are being met.

Stephanie is on that list.

When Dylan and I made it to the line of kids entering the field, an usher asked me to let Dylan go by himself because adults are not allowed to go onto the field. With 3-year old Dylan passing as a 4-year-old and not really knowing what was going on and why he was doing it, I wanted to assure him he was going to be fine so I followed him down to the field along the adjacent aisle.

During this whole time I have in my head: I have Dylan and Stephanie has Matthew. There are kids and parents everywhere. My Matthew radar is faint. And the recipe for a perfect storm is at hand.

I am with Dylan as he runs out onto the field. I ask a security guard where they are letting the kids off the field when they are done so I can make sure I am right there when Dylan exits. This is when Stephanie, who is watching Matthew, yells to me that my son is running towards me. I don’t hear her nor am I aware that Matthew is running towards me. Stephanie tells me later that I looked at her in the eye and nodded my head to acknowledge this from a distance but again, my Matthew radar was basically off and all senses were on watching Dylan. So when I pick up Dylan as he exits the field and Stephanie is right there with no Matthew, I freak out.

“Where is my son?” I asked Stephanie in panic.

To go into the horror of losing my son might bring up a lot of pain and sorrow. Never ever in my wildest imagination would I ever conceive of instances like these to occur. But in an instant all possible scenarios are running through my head. Did he get kidnapped? Is he hurt? He has got to be way more terrified than me! Far more than swallowing the pill of responsibility I am painstakingly concerned for the well-being of my child’s life. To pick out Matthew in a large crowd felt like finding a needle in a haystack, especially because he was not much taller than the rows of seats. Stephanie and I are running down every row and aisle trying to see if we can pick out anything. I ask two security guards to make mention over their radios that I lost my son and described him to them. After what seemed like minutes was probably only a few moments when a lady called my attention and pointed out onto the field. “Is that your son?” she asked.

Yes, yes, that is my son… and what a relief!

Sure enough there was Matthew, completely oblivious to the fact his father was having a nervous breakdown. In a moment I will remember more than he, there was my boy rounding second base and heading towards third, cutting the corner of the bag like he was daringly turning a double into a triple. My son who stole my heart that day was stealing third, the look of joy was upon his face, somehow believing in his little world that he was being taken care of – if not by me, he felt fine, and I give my utmost thanks and praise to the one God who watches over all of his flock.

As I process this moment that happened weeks ago, I hope I can live my life remembering the faith my son had that day.

Still...

2009-08-28T09:04:00.004-04:00

Our son is still very, very cute and entertaining.

I am still very, very pregnant and eager to meet our second kiddo.

The patriarch of the family, Mr. Michael Biers, is still amazing and wonderful. Even the lack of pictures attest to the fact that he's at work right now and the day before and the day before working his nose off for our family. He's perfect and the two above-pictured people adore him.

So that's what's up with us...still.

Matthew's New "School"

2009-08-28T00:08:00.003-04:00

So, with Matthew's fabulous sitters out of town for a month, we had to bite the bullet and find other childcare options for Matthew. A new daycare, located about 3 miles from our place, opened a month ago and after touring the facility and checking out their records, we decided Stepping Stones would do. Matthew was ready. He chose his bikeekeecycle shirt to wear, and started off with his new rain hat (it didn't last past the car ride, though). He only goes two days a week, and yesterday was his 4th day. He's doing better. It took some adjusting, but I'm glad too that we are doing something like this now...who knows how it'll be adjusting to a new baby (for all of us) and in my mind it helps to know that Matthew will have already been going through some changes himself, and perhaps won't feel as prone to blame it all on baby. Just theories, though, of course.

Bob and Jodi: if you read this...don't worry...the school's nice and shiny and all...but we can't wait for you to come back!!! Hope you're having fun! We love you.

Matthew at the house just before leaving for school.

Pulling up to the school, Mommy takes a side-view picture. Gotta capture it all, ya know?Matthew is excited to go inside and meet everyone.

He promptly sits at his little table with his new friends. He's taking it all in.
Out on the playground, he played with everything out there in a matter of minutes, so excited to touch and see it all.

The next morning, I tried to get some running commentary from the new 'classmate'.

24 Weeks and Counting

2009-07-30T10:07:00.003-04:00

I took regular profile pics during my pregnancy with Matthew. Thus, it's already proving a bit true for us that baby #2 gets slighted. With the Jersey shore as a backdrop, I couldn't resist asking Mike to take about 7 profile shots in the midst of a crowded boardwalk. There is an art to prego belly picture taking, as I had forgotten. In order to avoid looking like a beached whale, one hand on top and one on bottom helps to prove to the people that you really are all belly and not just extremely obese as you might otherwise look. All this to say, we really love you bouncy Biers baby number 2 and we can't wait to meet you, despite the lack of profile archives.

Matthew:

2009-07-13T09:26:00.004-04:00

We sat watching the fi-wa-works on YouTube just now
They being quite the source of fascination for you.
Don't get me wrong, Mommy's quite amazed herself by the exploding flowers of colored fire
But you take it to a whole new level, babe.

On the fourth, in person, you were very scared at first by the "boom boom pop"
shrinking towards mine or Daddy's legs, whichever stood closest
We crouched down and you stood taller and so forth and so on until you decided you quite liked the "fires" after all.

I am tired today, and admit I feel like a pretty crummy mom of a person.
You spill the grits and I snap; you bring me the truck and "Yeah, Mattie, it's a truck, alright?"

But Daddy just called, he might be coming home a bit early today.
Something in me opens up at the thought of our unit rejoining;
Now it seems the viewing of a fi-wa-works miracle is just what is needed...the dishes can wait.
You watch in wonder, every so often pointing and reminding me that the bursts are fires and
I run my finger up and down your arm - a soft habit admidst the booms and blaring trumpets coming from the screen.

I look down at that little arm and thoughts and visions explode in my mind...
this arm, what will it do? How will it change?
As it is, you have one little freckle down towards the wrist and, at the suggestion, you will gladly display your enormous muscles to eager inquisitors.
Your skin is tan from pool and pecan grove adventures and the barely visible hairs are short and blonde; your elbow more dimple than protruding bone.

You will be a strong and dedicated man, that much I am quite sure of. God did not bless you with the Daddy he did for you to escape that man's crazy-love influence....

Still, though, my little tot...can we postpone the change, make it drag out indefinitely? I so like you little -
The way you fit just right here against that place on me where my shoulder, chest and breast end and begin in that nice pillow-of-a-way.
I can bend down to the left just slightly and kiss your hairline and breath in your gritty, soapy, baby scent and feel your skeletal muscles move with each little suck on your passy.

No, I guess all that can be done is a conscious savoring of this very moment.
I will try with all my might to bottle this up and keep it forever, recalling it to mind on that day when we pull apart from a hug and I notice that your arms were big and strong around me.

I love being your mom, little man, I love it more than anything, even fiwaworks.
And I hope you like being my son;
Even though I must remind you again that you are too big for a passy, it's time to move on.

Oh...ouch.

2009-06-08T21:38:00.014-04:00

the main house on the property we live
the driveway to the property where we live

our home

Water Love

2009-05-27T15:53:00.002-04:00

Photographic Update

2009-05-21T12:17:00.007-04:00

Mike and Michael(husband to Annie's best friend, Amy, and friend now to us both)after running the Berry 5k

Mike finishing the Flying Pig half marathon in Cincinatti

Matthew and Nana

The cousins get a scrubbing down

Shout out to Amy, who graduated from Emory University with her Masters in Public Health (I'm so proud, friend!)

Don't drink the pool water, Matthew!

That's one big, good lookin' boy.

The cousins at a photo shoot (Reagan, Dylan, Matthew and Alex)

Yes, he's that big (and growing)

My self-made profile at 14.5 weeks (squint and you can see the new short hair)

Our Bouncy Baby Biers in utero at 14 weeks

And tonight we're off to Dayton for Mike's sister Erin's wedding to Frenchman, Cedric. It should be a lot of fun and certainly a great opportunity to take more pictures.

Love to all,
Mike and Annie

Since our last post...

2009-04-09T14:08:00.002-04:00

...a lot has happened. The biggest two being that we are pregnant again, and that I (Mike) finally landed a job. Annie is roughly eight weeks pregnant and we are expecting around November 16th. In this pregnancy nausea has hit her hard, which has led some to believe a little girl is inside causing all the trouble. Annie and I will be pleased with whatever gender God makes this baby. It is a win-win.

Next Monday I will begin work at the company I have been wanting to work for from the very beginnning. It has been a long wait to land a job since my job search first began last September. Thankfully Annie has been there to help with employment, and now a little pressure is off both our backs. A lot of change is sure to come with our new lifestyle of myself working during the day and Annie working at night. The season of unemployment since December has been a season of humility and a season of productivity. Most of all I will miss my time with Matthew. We have bonded a lot.

My mother drove all the way from Ohio to be with my family for a week. She cooked us meals, gave Matthew baths and put him to bed. It was great.

We just got back from a trip to Alabama where we attended the funeral of a matriarch in Annie's side of the family. She was Annie's great grandmother and she passed away at the age of 91. I have only known her for a little over a year and I was blessed to know her and see how much of a blessing she was and is to so many people. As sad as it was for so many people, it was such an honor to celebrate the life of great woman with a great spirit. Because she lived a good life it encourages me to run this race with a little more gratitude.

It is a great gift to be a witness to both new life and death.

Getting in

2009-03-09T16:19:00.002-04:00

I counseled a married couple today. We have a game plan: we'll meet individually once a week and then every third individual session, we'll come together the three of us and continue the hashing out. Will this help at all? I have no idea. It's just movement; beyond that, I feel so small in the whirlwind of the story they shared with me today.

My work at the Med is challenging. When I 'administer' the questionnaire, complete strangers give me detailed explanations of their battle with addiction, loneliness, shame and sorrow, and I tell them, 'thanks for participating' and leave the room. Friday night, during my graveyard shift, a depressed young man came into the ER for help. Reporting that he drinks 5 or more drinks in one sitting at least 25 or more times a year, that gave me the cue to ask for his enrollment in the study. He was wound way too tight internally to answer my questions, but since it was a slow night, I offered to sit with him until he was called. For an hour and a half he told me his hard tale. Ethically, I could not offer much. I told him he was brave. And he is.

I told the couple today that their honesty and vulnerabililty meant a lot to me. Boy does it ever.

I'm about to walk out the door with my husband and share a cup of coffee and a walk in the park with him. Doing these sacred things with him makes me feel so alive, so sturdy in my place. Then I remember where I was Friday night and just earlier today and I struggle to balance the two worlds. Indeed, I struggle just trying to realize that it's actually the same world...both beautiful and broken.

Mac reminded us of our salt and light status on Sunday morning, and really, I'm just so grateful to be God's girl. I do not know how I'd make sense of it all any other way.

Our Boy

2009-03-07T14:35:00.003-05:00

Senior Adult Choir Hip Hop (Short Version)

2009-03-06T10:20:00.001-05:00

Cadbury's Gorilla Advert Aug 31st 2007

2009-03-06T10:15:00.000-05:00

dreaming

2009-02-28T10:12:00.002-05:00

A month ago Annie was cleaning out her "stuff" from her parents' shed. As she was consolidating items from boxes to move into our home she came upon a survey question she had answered in high school. The question was, "Where do you see yourself in 5 years?" She had responded by stating she had always wanted to be a stay-at-home mom and hoped she would be there by 2004!! Well, as you know, it's 2009, and that picture has not exactly come true... yet. She just got her work schedule for the month of March and she will be working three 8 hour shifts a week, including a night shift here and there.

If I ever find a good job I hope our lifestyle will align with the dream Annie has always had to be present in the life of her children, especially their early development phase. Annie loves her new job and it has excellent perks. The best part about it is that she can rack up hours needed for her counseling certification. Don't get me wrong, I want to be present for Matthew's developmental stages as much as Annie, but she and I both feel we are most comfortable in the roles we have now "swapped."

On Tuesday morning I have an interview with a government municipality for the position titled, "Utilities Engineer." I really hope I get it because it would help me towards my professional liscensure and it would give Annie a better chance to stay at home more.

Annie has been great throughout this whole transition, willing to do whatever it takes to help take care of the family. People keep encouraging me, saying that God knows where I am hired already and that it is a matter of active waiting.

In the meantime Annie and I have made a new home on a beautiful property living in a rennovated barn adjacent to pecan grove. It is peaceful and beautiful and perfect. Definitely better than where we were previously living a week ago. No gunshots, no more thiefs on the backporch, no more swarming police cars, no more crackheads, no more base-thumping vulgar rap music, no more neighbors yelling profanity, no more fear to walk out of the house. Instead there are the sounds of birds, frogs, and insects chirping, wind blowing, pond fountain splashing, and trains off in the distance. In just a few weeks we can take scenic walks among blooming branches of cherry blossom and crapemertyle trees. Hopefully by then we will get our digital camera working again. Starting in mid-April in the nearby town a farmers market will begin its season and we plan to go there for some fresh produce. We couldn't have asked for a better place to rent. It is a dream.

Our Barn

2009-02-19T13:17:00.006-05:00

We feel so blessed to be moving into this renovated barn on the Williams-Slocumb property in Byron, GA. More than likely we will start moving tomorrow. It is about a 15 to 20 minute drive from where we are, which makes us that much closer to my parents in Forsyth. We (especially me) have not been comfortable in the neighborhood that we've been in. At this place, as the pictures show, we're in the country...technically we're smack in the middle of a pecan grove. Check out this edited picture that Mike worked with to show the aerial view.

So, anyone up for another housewarming party???? Just kidding, of course.

Seriously, come see us!

Have a great day,

Annie

The Big Red Ball Show

2009-02-19T12:17:00.009-05:00

Yesterday, our alarm sounded at 2:45 am and we got up, brewed some much-needed joe, packed some clothes for Matthew, and got him up, put him in the car and set out on the three hour drive to Tybee Island, GA. We went to see the Big Red Ball Show, or the sunrise, as everyone else besides the Ladners call it. It was completely worth the drive and the sacrifice of sleep - absolutely beautiful! See the progression below:

We then ate at a decent breakfast spot, appropriately named Sunrise. All we really needed was more coffee and some pancakes, so it worked.

Finally, we stopped in at Brannen, Searcy & Smith Law Firm in Savannah to surprise my fabulously wonderful good friend, Jessica Laster. It was much fun to see her face and see where she works. She's been a professed Matthew fan from the very beginning which was evident as each person that we were introduced to looked at Matthew and said, "Hey, I recognize you." Apparently his picture has been passed around the office more than once. Thanks, Jess, for loving us. I look forward to a longer visit.

To round out our day yesterday, we came home and took a lovely nap, woke up to tornado warnings and pretty much ignored them and headed to our friends', Larry and Joanie's house for an amazing dinner of shrimp scampi, garlic drop biscuits, salad, baked potato and blueberry cobbler. Thanks, Larry & Joanie!!

Love to all,

Annie

Walking the Plank

2009-02-16T22:10:00.008-05:00

Well, I'm (Annie) now employed. And this is where I'll be working:

Technically, I'll be working on the bottom floor, which is the ER. It's good to have a job, don't get me wrong. But I am filled with much ambivalence as I think about beginning this new position of 'working mom'. It seems almost like an oxymoron, were it not for the fact that stay-at-home moms work harder than most any profession. Blogging is still new enough to me that I'm really aware of what I want to say, and what I actually write, so in the tension of that, I'll just stop here and give details of the charge:

First off, I'll be a Health Education Specialist, which would be given the term "Addictions Intervention Specialist" if we weren't trying to tip-toe around things. I've been hired as an employee of the Medical Center of Central Georgia, but will be paid by the Federal Government, as I'm on a research team. I'm not a researcher per se, but am one of nine counselors that is gathering the data needed for the 5-year research project. What happens is, every patient that comes into this busy ER is screened by their nurse with a three-question 'test' and either given a positive or negative. If they are positive, then I come in and ask if they're willing to talk to me about the addiction that they could be in complete denial that they even have. They have every right to say, "No thank you very much I do not wish to speak to you, Miss Health Educator blah blah blah". Or they could say "sure, what the heck?", at which point I pull out my pre-printed questionairre that I then administer and check yes or no. If we get to the point where we've finished the questionairre and they haven't kicked me out of their curtained 5 by 5 space, then I employ the all-powerful motivational interview, which I will be skilled in next week. The hope is that enough people will admit to wanting help, at which point I'll have up to 6 follow-up sessions with them (also to take place in the ER - not sure how that's gonna work). After that, we refer them out. And the point of all this.....to save the health care industry the money that it takes to re-admit uninsured, accident-prone addicts. So...yeah.

I start Monday. Mike has a job interview Thursday. It feels like we're walking the plank or something. Or at least it probably would if we hadn't decided to live it up this week. We started by spending some time with a Seattle friend, Mike Beck. Just to see him was gift enough, but we drove an hour north to High Falls State Park and went on a little hike. It was a beautiful day and we had a lot of fun. Dylan and Matthew loved it and Dylan especially was proud to show the river his newest trick: peeing standing up.

Matthew kept assuming that he could just run right into the river...we've got a lot to look forward to with this fearless little boy.

Here's a few more pics from the trip:

Tomorrow we go look at a potentail new place to live, so that's exciting. This place is just really not working. While Mike went to visit Mike Beck on Saturday, I was home alone and freaking out by 9 o'clock. Some guy had come to the door earlier in the day wanting to give "Nicholas" "his money" for "not showin up to court". Whatever. I rather not keep sitting here like a target, thank you very much. We plan to leave in the middle of the night on Tuesday and drive to Tybee Island to watch the sunrise over the Atlantic, because, why not? I'm getting my hair done by it's rightful do-er on Friday - my Jeanna Bean and if I'm lucky I'll get to spend some time with her and maybe even Amy and Michael too. Woo hoo! So, it will be a good week, my friends. We're determined.

As it is right now, I think we're both about to pass out. More soon. Thanks for reading.

Love,
Annie

The thief's desire

2009-02-13T10:45:00.005-05:00

I just put Matthew down for his morning nap and straightened up things in our tiny home before sitting down once again at the laptop. I am starting to feel comfortable in the routine of being unemployed and a stay-at-home dad. While Annie picks up hours doing office work, lays the foundation for her private practice, and actually lands interviews, I have been playing with Matthew during the day as well tending to the house and yard. In the past few months, I have applied for at least 15 jobs within a very specific scope of the engineering industry. My first official interview is set up for February 19th. I look foward to the day I can work ($$) again for my family and feel hopeful that day is near.

On making a new home, I haven't necessarily felt the neighborhood we have recently moved to is that place just yet. I don't think it ever will. Once Annie and I get going with income we hope to move out immediately. There are a lot of things I'd like to do to better this property, but we do not own the property and we do not live in the kind of neighborhood where people care a great deal about the cosmetics of their property. Just the other morning I raked leaves in the backyard and while having not finished I filled 19 huge trash bags. I wasn't counting. It felt good to accomplish a task so efficiently... until later in the day I found out that certain things within the past 24 hours were stolen from our shed. Knowing this made me then feel raking the yard was void of meaning. I thought, "Why even care about making this a home when we should be getting the heck outta Dodge?!"

I am baffled by the culprits' urge to commit such an act. They stole 210 lbs of Olympic iron weights, the majority of the bench set my mom struggled to bring down from Ohio last weekend. What they stole could be purchased online for at least $250. I have had these weights since my high school years and I was eagerly looking forward to lifting weights within the limits of our new home.

And so I sit here at the window, pondering, what drives us to steal?

Twas the Night Before Christmas

2008-12-24T12:04:00.000-05:00

Hi all! I guess with my family being reunited, I have not felt the urgency to write as much. I do like this blogging thing, though, and want to keep at it. First off, for those of you wondering, please use my parent's mailing address during this homeless stage of our lives. If you've mailed something to our Shoreline address, it's all being forwarded to this one anyways. It is:
511 Music Row Forsyth, GA 31029

So yes, we are all back together again and that's wonderful. Matthew is feeling better, though still having a rough time sleeping at night (he seems to sleep fine during the day...hmmm). The patriarch and the youngest of the family share the same birthday, so first it was to Bob Evans for breakfast to celebrate GGPa's birthday, which Matthew and I did not get to attend based on the fact that we got very little sleep the night before (Mike didn't either, because he's amazing with Matthew at 3 o'clock in the morning, but he hadn't yet seen his Grandpa, and wanted to go, so..). Then we all braved the icy roads to head over to TGIFriday's for Mike's brother, David's, birthday dinner. The tradition follows that everyone heads back to the house for cake, presents and pictures. Matthew had cake and boy did he love it. His nice, healthy diet has totally taken a plunge since we've been here and it's safe to say he adores all things sugary and fried.

OOps, he's upstairs crying now and I've been hiding in the basement for a while now, so I better head up. But here's wishing you all a lovely Christmas. We continue to miss so many of you that are reading these words now. PLease know that you'll be thought of and missed tomorrow.

Love,
The Biers

2008-12-21T18:45:00.000-05:00

HE'S HERE! HE'S HERE!!

PRAISE GOD!

(We'll write more later, but both Andrew and Mike are here, both cars are here, the frostbite held off and warm dinner is being dished up).

Thank you, friends and family, for your prayers....

....WE'RE ALL HERE!

The Dayton Children's Hospital is Nice

2008-12-20T21:29:00.000-05:00

How do I know? Well, I just got back to my in-laws house after taking Matthew there after three days of no appetite, little sleep, vomiting, diarrhea and a monstrous rash began taking over his body. The diagnosis: Something fancy that translates to stomach flu. The Biers family of 20 plus (ok, I'm exaggerating a tad, but not by much) is now on high alert and wondering if the rumble in their tummy is the Papa Murphy's pizza being rejected from their flu-infested intestines, or if their pyschosomatic persuasions are on the increase. At any rate, my baby is sleeping now, and knock on wood, he seems as though he will stay that way for a little while. After being up from 1 am until 7 am last night, some sleep is in demand for that little body. So as for me, I should be heading to the 'red room' (as opposed to the yellow or blue: also vacant rooms in my in-laws' house) to catch up on my zzz's.

A quick Mike update: It seems as though Isaac's friend, Eli, was struck with said stomach flu and is feeling better. They hope to pull into Minneapolis sometime tonight around 2. Mike and Miller plan to wake up at 4 and start driving this way. Chicago in particular was hit with a doozie of a storm today, so let's continue to pray for safe traveling. Now they just need to get here and figure out how to get Miller 4 hours north to Akron, OH. Oh, boy...we'll think about that one later. I'll just be happy to have my husband back within snuggle distance (awwww).

Goodnight and love,
Mrs. Biers, mommy of sick baby Matthew, wife to nation traveler, Mike and daughter of the King, hallelujah!

Long distance relationships are not our cup of tea

2008-12-19T21:29:00.000-05:00

Hi again, all. Mike has rested...all day. Yessss!

Mike and Miller arrived in Minneapolis around 11 o'clock last night, still in time for the Christmas party that was happening at the apartment they are staying in. I guess they went to bed eventually and slept until 8:30 (Mike hasn't slept that late in a long, long time). Nathan (the friend they are with) has an HD tv something or another projected onto a wall in his apartment...at any rate, they watched movies, big and loud and up close and personal and great and stuff. So, that was fun. They plan on repeating today's activities tomorrow, as Isaac and Eli (remember? the guys driving the Jeep) were only able to make it from Missoula to Billings today. They say they'll be in Minneapolis late tomorrow night. I say, yeah...we'll see about that. But, who knows - maybe they will. So, the earliest I can see my husband is late Sunday night. But possibly not until Sunday. Oh how I miss that man.

As for Annie and Matthew highlights: I got to go to Trader Joe's today and get Matthew some of his favorite, familiar yummies, which didn't work - he's still not really eating for anything. He did have some plain 'ole pasta tonight, so that's something. It was while in the Trader Joe's checkout line that I realized I'd left $40 in the cash-back thingymabobber at Wal Mart, where I bought a $3 box of Graham Crackers. So, all in all, I paid $43 for some Honey Maid graham bees today, so Matthew better eat each and every one. I did come home and cry about it just a little. I mean, $40 is a lot of money these days. And it was so preventable. I called Wal Mart as soon as I realized it (spent about $7 on 4-1-1 calls, but that's another story) and was told by two separate ladies in a row, "Oh, I'm sure it's long gone, but I'll check and see if anyone's turned in anything." Hello!?! Don't you think the fact that My money was long-gone was something that I was considering? Um, yeah. So, why not be a little nice to me about it? I'm already feeling like a moron, thank you. Oh well. It's not their sweet faults I left the money in the slot, but they really should put it somewhere other than shin-level. That's just assisting people with short-term memory loss.

The cousins were over today to play. That was lots of fun. Then we went to their house and had pizza for dinner. It's so great to watch all the boys play. It also makes me even more excited to watch Reagan, Alex, Dylan and Matthew all together playing for the first time. That will be so sweet.

So that big, fat, fiction book I ordered and told many of you about? It came, and I've started reading it, but have only made it to page 20 in 4 days. I see that graduate school has impinged my reading skills indefinitely. At any rate, I'm going to go curl up in my bed with it again and see it I can make it successfully to page 35. It's "The Hour I First Believed" by Wally Lamb. Anyone want to make it to page 20 and read along with me? That'd be fun.

Ok, goodnight and love to all.

Pressing On

2008-12-18T14:36:00.000-05:00

Wow! I just got through checking out some views of Seattle this morning - beautiful! I guess everyone's enjoying a day in? I hope so. We are supposed to get snow here in Kettering starting tomorrow night and through the weekend. Maybe we'll have a White Christmas? That'd be lovely.

I just wanted to give everyone a quick update: Mike and Miller made it to Billings!!! Mike said the drive from about Butte, MT on was beautiful. At one point, the huge, orange moon sat on the horizon beckoning them onward. The roads were dry and the stars were out. They stayed with one of Mike's former pastors in Billings and woke up this morning to hot oatmeal and fruit. Yay! That sure beats an Egg McMuffin. They're on the road again and are determined to make it to Minneapolis by late tonight, where they will stay with a friend, Nathan Trimbauch. The roads look good all the way through.

I received an email from Issac and Eli this morning - the two guys driving the Jeep for us - and they hit the road at noon. Being from northern Minnesoata, they are both confident of their driving-in-the-snow skills, which they'd have to be, judging by the pictures I've just seen.

On a gross note, Matthew threw up in his bed last night - like, real big people throw up. Yes it's a first, but I'll decline to record it in the baby book, I think. It was a little after 5 this morning, so we had to tip-toe about the house cleaning him up, washing his sheets, etc. We played for a bit, then layed back down and when I woke up at 10:45, I sat up to look in his crib and he was just sitting there looking at me. Cute. He seems to be doing fine this morning, although his appetite has been touchy. I did finally see the top of that bottom tooth this morning, so for all you fellow moms who are in the "let's track our children's teething progress together" club, rejoice in this slow-to-arrive tooth making its awaited for appearance (that was some sentence).

Somewhat of a boring post, but hey, I'm grateful that it is. Matthew and I hope to get by and visit GGPa (Matthew's great-grandfather) who was moved into a nursing home last week. It will be good to see him and hopefully brighten his day a bit.

Oh, and last thing: We got Matthew's new birth certificates in the mail just before I headed to the airport on Tuesday. Name: Matthew Alverson Biers Mother: Annie Ruth Ladner Father: Michael Wilson Biers.......YES AND THANK YOU, LORD!!!

Ta Ta for now! We miss and love you!

Already an Update

2008-12-17T15:57:00.000-05:00

So, I just talked to Mike, and he has not actually made it out of the state yet. He called from Spokane and said that the snow is heavy and road conditions are rough. They've seen several accidents. He got me to check the Idaho Dept. of Transportation website and sure enough, just over the border there's a multi-vehicle crash that is blocking I-90. And he says he still wants to make it to Billings. Oh, my.

So-long Seattle

2008-12-17T14:51:00.000-05:00

Well, folks....we're gone....just like that.

Ok, we all know better. There was no "just like that" about it.

After months of planning, hoping, predicting, wondering, and schedule-making, the Biers family has vacated Seattle. At this point, we've all vacated the state. Matthew and I flew out yesterday and I think I made the lady beside me a little nervous with all my boo-hooing, but I don't care. So I feel, shoot me. It was a beautiful, clear, blue day and every mountain that exists in the area could be seen. My mind of course was racing as we climbed higher and I pictured all of my many adventures by foot, car, boat, monorail and bus. Then the tears really rushed in as I pictured my dear, cherished friends down there running about, doing life: chasing children, creating, writing, dreaming, cussing, eating...we made some beautiful friendships with beautiful people. The tears lasted about 15 minutes and no more. I had cried my way through the last half hour of case conference yesterday morning, and so the headache incurred there was cursing me for adding more strain.

Whew, case conference. It was a doozie. Why should eleven-year-old children suffer such atrocious wrongs? I don't know. But as I pondered the question, I came full circle and could vividly picture myself sitting in my office a little over 4 years ago, clicking on the Mars Hill website for the first time and reading the words "How do you enter a fallen world?" I realized yesterday that my passion to enter has only grown stronger. The calling placed on my life was affirmed in a 4th-floor Practicum room, and while I have been at the best place possible to equip me for entering such places of despair, the point is that I still want to enter them at all. The point is that despair doesn't get the last word. Hope does. And man did that ever bring me to tears. I shared these thoughts with the group of 5, and they gathered around me, layed hands on me and prayed. Thank God.

So, the flights were good - loooong flights with a rushed layover, but all things considered, Matthew did great, was a real trooper and is presently sleeping off his jet-lag upstairs (in the crib Mike slept in as a baby - with the same vintage Pooh bear mobile, mind you). We went over and played with the cousins, Braden, Andrew and Parker for a bit. I've been waiting with great anticipation to watch those 4 play together, and it was great. There was so much to entertain Matthew, that I got to sit and enjoy a gourmet meal of Combo Number One from Chick-fil-A, baby!! Mmm, mmm, mmm. It was deee-lish.

And as for my amazing husband and our good friend, Miller: Well, they left at 6 o'clock this morning (Seattle time) for the open, icy road. They made it over Snoqualmie Pass, without tire chains even, and are now somewhere in Idaho. He may have called since I've been down here typing. But, so far, they are good, ahead of schedule, and hoping to make it all the way to Billings, Montana tonight. They managed to get the apartment cleaned, both car top carriers packed and loaded on the vehicles and the Honda packed yesterday - and everything fit! Good friends from church came by to pick up trash, our remaining Craigslist items and boxes of books to mail. Mike spoke to our landlord yesterday and implied our frustration about the past 2 month's circumstances and told him to be looking for a letter from us in the mail asking for some grace due to our inconveniences. So, we'll see how that goes.

So, I'm super sleepy and am not even sure of the efficacy of this first blog to inform. I'm going to try and nap while Matthew's napping and will update you all again soon. THanks for your continued thoughts and prayers for us. We miss you and love you.